![a Bottle of Champagne.
This one goes out to those of you who take a classier beverage than our Fastest Possible Beer. The present bottle of champagne was David’s work, and took 17 seconds to draw.
Strictly speaking, the request was for a “Popped Bottle of Champagne”, which I took to mean “Hello, you actually mean the Fastest Possible Bottle of Champagne”. Technically, the only visible difference between a tiny drawing of a champagne bottle and a tiny drawing of a wine bottle is the tiny fancy cork (which, my friends at Wikipedia tell me, is called an “aglomerated cork”). That would seem to be the fastest possible difference, but I doubt that any of you would permit us that subtlety.
No, the Fastest Possible Bottle of Champagne has been opened, and not in the anticlimactic way that fancy people do it [exhibit A], but in the pointlessly wasteful fashion that professional athletes do [exhibit B]. Had it taken no additional seconds to draw in a saber and a fat waiter with an oiled mustache and too-small tuxedo, I’d have added that, too. Champagne only comes in one style, and that style is “amazing”.
A short legal note here: I am required by French law to point out that this Fastest Possible Bottle of Champagne bears no visible designation of origin or production method, but I assure you that there is no mistaking the luxurious “POOOP” of a joyously-opened Fastest Possible Bottle Of Sparkling Wine Produced in the Champagne Region of France. C’est vrai!
VIDEO APPENDIX:
EXHIBIT A: THIS IS NOT HOW YOU DO IT
EXHIBIT B: THIS IS HOW YOU DO IT](http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_loc5z1h29e1qbs5uso1_1280.jpg "a Bottle of Champagne.
This one goes out to those of you who take a classier beverage than our Fastest Possible Beer. The present bottle of champagne was David’s work, and took 17 seconds to draw.
Strictly speaking, the request was for a “Popped Bottle of Champagne”, which I took to mean “Hello, you actually mean the Fastest Possible Bottle of Champagne”. Technically, the only visible difference between a tiny drawing of a champagne bottle and a tiny drawing of a wine bottle is the tiny fancy cork (which, my friends at Wikipedia tell me, is called an “aglomerated cork”). That would seem to be the fastest possible difference, but I doubt that any of you would permit us that subtlety.
No, the Fastest Possible Bottle of Champagne has been opened, and not in the anticlimactic way that fancy people do it [exhibit A], but in the pointlessly wasteful fashion that professional athletes do [exhibit B]. Had it taken no additional seconds to draw in a saber and a fat waiter with an oiled mustache and too-small tuxedo, I’d have added that, too. Champagne only comes in one style, and that style is “amazing”.
A short legal note here: I am required by French law to point out that this Fastest Possible Bottle of Champagne bears no visible designation of origin or production method, but I assure you that there is no mistaking the luxurious “POOOP” of a joyously-opened Fastest Possible Bottle Of Sparkling Wine Produced in the Champagne Region of France. C’est vrai!
VIDEO APPENDIX:
EXHIBIT A: THIS IS NOT HOW YOU DO IT
EXHIBIT B: THIS IS HOW YOU DO IT")
a Bottle of Champagne.
This one goes out to those of you who take a classier beverage than our Fastest Possible Beer. The present bottle of champagne was David’s work, and took 17 seconds to draw.
Strictly speaking, the request was for a “Popped Bottle of Champagne”, which I took to mean “Hello, you actually mean the Fastest Possible Bottle of Champagne”. Technically, the only visible difference between a tiny drawing of a champagne bottle and a tiny drawing of a wine bottle is the tiny fancy cork (which, my friends at Wikipedia tell me, is called an “aglomerated cork”). That would seem to be the fastest possible difference, but I doubt that any of you would permit us that subtlety.
No, the Fastest Possible Bottle of Champagne has been opened, and not in the anticlimactic way that fancy people do it [exhibit A], but in the pointlessly wasteful fashion that professional athletes do [exhibit B]. Had it taken no additional seconds to draw in a saber and a fat waiter with an oiled mustache and too-small tuxedo, I’d have added that, too. Champagne only comes in one style, and that style is “amazing”.
A short legal note here: I am required by French law to point out that this Fastest Possible Bottle of Champagne bears no visible designation of origin or production method, but I assure you that there is no mistaking the luxurious “POOOP” of a joyously-opened Fastest Possible Bottle Of Sparkling Wine Produced in the Champagne Region of France. C’est vrai!
VIDEO APPENDIX:
